Damn that is funny. I missed the first time you did this bit with Missy. But reading it this time around made me laugh outloud. The thing about Missy of Watertown NY is she eerily looks like a friend of mine Jen of Minneapolis. Of course half of freaking Minnesota looks like Missy/Jen.

Boy, I thought Missy of Watertown was hot, but Tina... wowie wow wow. A guy could get lost in those eyes. And I'll bet she's smart and funny and can do origami with her eyes closed... just the girl I've always dreamed of. I think I'll ask her out. I think I'll ask her to marry me.

Ah, but she lives in Tampa. If I moved down there, I'd probably have to become a Devil Rays fan, and that's not worth it. And I'd never convince her to move up here, because she's pathetically attached to Central Florida, I can feel it. Plus, I'll bet she has an ex-boyfriend named Lars who's a 6'4" Navy SEAL and who will pound me into next week if I so much as raise an eyebrow in her direction. Women like her usually do. And she looks kind of easy.

Ah, forget it. I'm a busy man, and it's not worth the hassle. She'll have to content herself with the slick-haired Tampa men with their pants hitched up over their guts. Her loss.

Man, dating is HARD.