Bizarre Writers' Guild


Our new challenge sentence story: Trondheim.

Chain Letter Story
Take this story, write a few paragraphs, send it to two friends, and see what happens.
Andre & Zack
Multiple stories inspired by the same group of sentences. Write you own version and send it in. A&Z #5 posted April 6.
Fink Went to the Beach
A rather foul story by Tor.
The Demon Tim
This is an exercise in communal fiction, written by Hodge, Tor, and Carl. Hodge started the story and e-mailed it to Tor, who added to it and e-mailed it to Carl. So it went until it was finished. A horizontal rule represents a change in writer.
No Mere Walk in the Park
Also known as "Bobby the Cheese Horse." Written by Carl with help from Hodge using a method now known as "challenge sentences." Hodge e-mailed me six sentences, all independent and out of context, with the challenge, "Use any or all of these in a story." So I did. Sentences in bold face are those from which the story was born.
Game Show of the Damned
Same deal as "No Mere Walk in the Park." You will question my mental health after reading this.
Jello Flavors That Should Never Be
There's always room for Jello! Word of this particular page is apparently spreading via e-mail. Many authors have contributed to this list. Hodge e-mailed a group of people and said "Think of the worst possible flavors for Jello." He compiled this list, and submitted them back to us for a vote on the worst. Tunana (tuna-banana medley) was the winner, but I think it was just because it has a cute name. Additions to this list are always welcome.
The Daily Demon
New! It isn't exactly daily, but that sounds good...need a demon? We have a few.
Some bad freakin' poems
Also available: the epic Chant of the Llamas.
A strange view of life
Random observations from BWG member Freedom Wave (takes you off this site).
Other things
Including Friends o' BWG, sites with links to ours.

Would you like to be notified when new stuff is added to this site? Would you also like to give us some idea who is actually reading this freakin' thing? We're going to start a mailing list with BWG updates. Your information will not be given to anyone else or used for any commercial purpose. Mailings will not be sent automatically or on any regular basis, just whenever we post some new stuff. Let's go to the form...

The recipe says simply, "Plunge a sharp knife into top of lobster's head just behind the eyes (to kill it quickly); chop into 8-10 pieces." The recipe lies. I embedded a paring knife to the hilt in that lobster's head, wiggled it around for a few minutes and it had absolutely no effect except to make the lobster writhe in pain. I frantically changed the angle of the knife around, the depth, stabbing like a madman. Rasputin the lobster wiggled his legs and claws and refused to die. Luckily, I happened to have a large pot of boiling water nearby. Rasputin went in head first, and wiggled for a few more minutes, finally coming to a stop. Because the recepe calls for the lobster to be sauted instead of boiled, I pulled him out. As I started chopping him into 8-10 pieces, he began to struggle again. However, once he was completely delimbed and de-tailed, I chucked the head into the trash. And tossed him down the garbage chute. Last night, I had a dream of him climbing back up, like something out of Terminator 2. So now I sit here, waiting for a tap-tap-tap at the door to tell me that Rasputin has come for payback. As penance, I'm listening to Falco's 'Rock me Amadeus' on repeat. Something tells me that its not enough.

NOTICE: Anyway, all works included herein are NOT in the public domain. All copyrights are retained by the authors. Web sites may freely link to the front page at, but may not link directly to any story or other included work. If you have completely lost your mind and are interested in publishing any of the included works in any format, please e-mail Carl to be put in touch with the relevant parties. Contributions to or questions about the Bizarre Writers' Guild should also be directed to Carl, that big fool. If you e-mail us about anything, use "Bizarre Writers Guild" as your subject line.